With all of the unrest unfolding in the world (The election, Obama, McCain, The Palin-ator, Russia, The Allen Iverson trade, etc.), I've had to re-examine my beliefs and how the world as I know it holds up to those beliefs. So, here is what I've come up with….

There are four absolutes in the world, and everything else is just made up. The four absolutes you ask? Simple….

1.Birth (If you were not born, the following three do not apply)
2.Death (Once you die, the following two no longer apply)
3.Mother Nature (This really has nothing to do with you)
4.Baseball (I take back the explanations of the first two, baseball always applies)

So, aside from those four, everything is either made up or artificially created. Taxes, government, Senators, financial reports, racism, sexism, religion, artificial sweeteners, jury duty, habeus corpas, David Hasselhoff, speculative gains, waiting an hour to swim after eating, funnel cakes, France, Ritalin, filibusters, interest rates, the DMV, THE Ohio State University, flan, synchronized swimming, insurance, hot pants, all of these are just examples of the millions and millions of things we see everyday that were just made up by people just like you and me.

We don't really know if the people that conjured up these things were really thinking about the greater good of mankind or the greater good of their own bank account (Which, as we know now, was made up by someone). So, figuring that if we are born and all we have is Mother Nature, baseball and an impending sense of doom (Cubs fans know that of which I speak), what would I make up to better serve mankind? I kid you not, my first thought right now was Soft Serve Ice Cream, but I'm going to dismiss that thought for a moment. Not that Soft Serve Ice Cream it isn't a good thought, but that sort of serves my stomach more than mankind in general- and besides, no one's made up butter yet, which I think is instrumental in Soft Serve Ice Cream. So, my initial concoction for mankind is…..jetpacks. The kind they had back in Super Bowl I, which you never really see anymore. Everyone gets a jet pack, no cars. That should help the ecology, and it would instantly create a need for hairdressers- so in one fell swoop, I have made an environmental impact AND created jobs. So, what would YOU create?